Desi Disco

Pali and Jay's Ultimate Asian Wedding DJ Roadshow invites audiences to immerse themselves in the chaos and revelry of a UK South Asian wedding, as the DJ duo set out to cement their position as the 19th best Asian wedding DJs... in Southall. Here, uncle Pali and nephew Jay go B2B to soundtrack their ideal Punjabi knees-up

The party starter

Jay – Oh that’s gotta be that song... (sings) ‘Turn me on, turn me onnnnn... kiss me squeeze’ – it gets everyone proper close and the heat cranked right up! Obviously, I know my Uncle will say that’s not ‘civilised’ and tell me to go to ‘Glaston-berry’ if I want to hear that type of music. But when he goes to the toilet at gigs and tells me not to touch the decks, sometimes I do play a snippet of that song.

Pali – No, no, no. Never. The proper way to start the party is to invite the guests on the dance floor and – oh you mean which song would I play? Achar right! Well then there’s only one correct answer...‘Sadi Gali’ by Lehmber Hussainpuri.
Jay probably said some dirty song didn’t he right? Haha, he’s a good kid really, he listens to what I say, especially when we’re at gigs and I go to use the loo, he never touches the decks.


The ultimate slow jam

Jay – The ULTIMATE slow jam yeah? I love that song, it starts with them two on top of a car at a drive through cinema… proper frisky... thought it was gonna be a fake taxi for a second. Speaking of… I once said that to my Uncle and he didn’t know what that was, so I told him a fake taxi is what you call any cab company that isn’t an uber. Then I heard him talking to the groom at a gig once, a young guy and Uncle Pali was saying ‘Yeah I do PT on the side, I’m also considering getting into the mini cab game, not uber or nothing.. more of a fake taxi.’ Ahhh you should’ve seen the look on the groom’s face! Priceless.

Pali – Hmm let me have a think... I know Jay’s gonna say ‘Tujhko Jo Paya’ he’s always singing that. It is a nice song to be fair. Beautiful romantic love story. Yeah let’s go with that.


The song for the aunties

Jay – A song the aunties love? Anything I’m singing (winks) Haha nah you gotta ask Uncle Pali about this one, he loves the auntiya! Always dedicating ‘Kala Chashma’ to them, probably puts on his black shades to watch them dance lol. Don’t be deceived though... he got game. His nickname in high school was ‘Player Pali’. Well I don’t know if that’s true, but if we all say it I reckon that’ll catch on

Pali – Well... I’ve found in parties that the auntiya really love to dance to ‘London Tumakhda’ and also.. ’Kala Chashma’…
Jay said what?! No way I don’t put on black shades to watch them dance! You can check my Google reviews, no one’s ever said that about me. I swear! Check it right now... also leave us 5 stars yeah?


The Asian wedding banger to end all banger

Jay – (pretends to adjust glasses) Well if you break down the fundamentals of punjabi music... Did that look good? Me pretending like I’ve got glasses? I’m making it look like I’m a conn-O-isseur of Punjabi music. Like obviously I know this is a text only interview but hopefully the readers think I’m proper knowledgeable. So as I was saying… the fundamentals of Punjabi music is essentially people singing about alcohol. ‘Daaru Pee Ke’ or ‘Patiala Peg’ by Diljit Dosanjh. Shoutout Diljit paaji.

Pali – Punjabi music has a wonderful and rich history... lots of complexities that comes from folk music they would sing in the village. People think it’s all about alcohol these days... but it’s not. I will select ‘Gureh Nalon Ishq’ by Malkit Singh ji. 


The best song to close the night

Jay – (makes train noises) Choo Choo! Come on. Is this even a question? See there’s only one correct answer for how to end the night. Rail Gaddi! Everyone together, hands on the shoulders of the person in front of you, creating a fricking train that’s got better service than Great Western Rail! It’s legendary. Shoutout to Mangal Singh Uncle!

Pali – All aboard everyone! The train is departing the platform! If Jay even said anything apart from Rail Gaddi then I’m disowning him. I’d play that song at bloody funerals too. Everyone together, circling the venue and ending up back on the dance floor, it’s like the ending of a film. Nothing like it. It’s actually the law in some countries that you have to end the night with that song... well Jay said that to me once. I’m doubting it now...