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The Very Best of the Edinburgh Festivals 2024
Review: Assembly Hall
Review: Orchestra of Sound
Review: After the Silence
Published 24 Aug 2010
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- On my day off I went to the movies and watched the Karate Kid remake. Don't fuck with the classics. I felt like a paedo as it was still school holidays I think;
- Did a day time gig at Best of the Fest, I don't think the audience liked me very much. They only had one bored face to look at, I had to look at 400;
- Ate a pie way too fast and burnt the roof of my mouth;
- Thought about what a cock The List is;
- Finally did my washing;
- Didn't climb Arthurs seat again;
- Did a photo shoot where I was told to look more zany. I already look like a cross between all three of The Goodies in one head… isn't that enough?;
- Met a dog named Doctor Noodles;
- Wrote a poem about a garden gnome named Glenn: Glenn sat in the garden, a moth sat on his head but being made stone... he couldn't feel it. It wasn't a very good poem at all;
- Tried not to be awkward around one of my comedy heroes who was visiting my flatmate, so I pretended to go to bed, rather than let it be any more awkward;
- Went to a community radio station in Leith and thought, "What lovely people"
- Ate my soup and club sandwich combo at the Tree House Cafe for the 3rd time in a week
- Put my neck out wrestling with David Quirk in my bromantic play called The Incident. Neck was so sore I went for a massage and was talked in to acupuncture…. hmmmm;
- Bought some over-the-counter sleeping tablets, then took too many and had to walk down the hallway at a 45 degree angle to get to the toilet. God I hope it all went in the bowl;
- Had a fantasy about taking the midnight train going anywhere but realised it only went to Newcastle;
- Watched a dad make a paper swan out of a serviette for his daughter and thought what a nice dad he is;
- Thought about going to the Loft Bar, but then decided against having numerous conversations with people who won't make eye contact and keep looking over my shoulder for someone better to talk to;
- Decided that when the festival is over I'm going to watched a Mike Leigh film marathon to balance out all the forced funny and lols from the past three weeks;
- Regreted writing the acronym "lols".